Making you seem more interesting than you really are, one random fact at a time.

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I can see why they cast Ryan Reynolds to play me, we have eerily similar physiques.

Background on the article from the man himself, Van Wilder Bert Kreischer: In 1997 I was coming up in my seventh year of college when I got a phone call one day from Rolling Stone Magazine. The man on the other line explained that they were writing an article about FSU being the number one party school, and that he had gotten my name from a number of poeple at the school, & would like me show them a good time. I thought it was a prank call. I laughed, said "sure", hung up, and left with my buddies to play frisbee golf. A month later a journalist named Erik Hedegard knocked on my front door to write the article. We took him everywhere. If I went to class, he went to class. If I took a shit, he waited outside the door. And when I partied he turned on a tape recorder and partied along side me. Then he left. I didn't really hear much from him for the next five months, until April 1st 1997, when an article titled "The Undergraduate" came out in Rolling Stone Magazine. Much to my suprise it was an article proclaiming me as "the Number One Party Animal in the Counrty". Apparently the editor of Rolling Stone thought that they should change the scope of the article and focus less on the school and more on me, so they did, and it changed my life. The media went crazy. I did a ton of radio interviews, TV interviews, ESPN sent a guy named "Jonny Knoxville" to Tallahassee with a tour bus to shoot a commercial, Oliver Stone optioned the rights to my life, I tried stand-up for the first time, I got offered my own Morning show, I moved to New York, I graduated (in that order), and after a year or so of working dead end jobs in NY I finally became a real stand-up comedian.   It's this article that eventually got turned into the Van Wilder franchise.

Rolling Stone’s The Undergraduate:

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How is this not more entertaining than women’s basketball or men’s hockey? Hot college coeds rising up to the sky and spiking the shit out of the leather ball, digging down deep to scoop up spikes, setting up perfectly, and blocking 83% of everything that comes their way. One point had more thrills and excitement than any regular season NBA game. And still ESPN would rather show PBA or UPA “games.” Pathetic.

More Edge-Of-Your-Seat Action:

31 Pictures Of Girls Playing College Volleyball. ‘Nuff Said.

32 More Pictures Of Girls Playing College Volleyball

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Former NYU professor Jose Angel Santana is suing the school for wrongful termination after insinuating that he was let go because he gave the famed actor a “D” in his ‘Directing the Actor II’ class.

The professor accuses the school of “bending over backwards to create a Franco-friendly environment” and insists that Franco was lucky to even get a passing grade after missing 12 out of the 14 classes.

Santana goes on to say that Franco missed just as many classes in other courses but still received favourable grades. And to reward his professors for such generous grades Franco hired one of them, Jay Anania, to write and direct his movie, “William Vincent.” and gave the head of the department, John Tintori, a cameo appearance in the film as well. This all according to the sourpuss former professor.

Long story short Santana was pissed Franco picked Jay over him to direct his movie. And why is he complaining about preferential treatment? Famous people, college athletes, students who sleep with their professors, and students who get high with their professors will always get better grades. These are the rules of the world. There is no sense in fighting the unwritten laws that govern us. When you do that you get fired.  

PS. He probably didn’t like that Franco, a perceived 30 year-old entitled Hollywood burnout, who only came to class twice, was able to ace all his papers effortlessly, and had the fame, knowledge, and career that the Santana desperately strived for his entire life (but obviously failed miserably accomplishing).

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The year's best fails are here to help bring out the holiday spirit in all of us

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When the first teaser trailer appeared a few months ago the internet geek army was up in arms over the perceived mediocrity of the second sequel, crying hysterically, saying that the third instalment wouldn’t  be able to live up to the hype. That Nolan’s resting on his laurels. That Bane was the wrong villain. That Anne Hathaway was the wrong cunt Catwoman (I still agree with them on that one). That they fucked up the greatest action movie franchise, a la George Lucas.

Now they’re prejaculating (just made it up) over how amazing it’s going to be. And judging by the first official trailer it looks magnificent. Even I’m somewhat aroused. But I can’t pinpoint why exactly. It’s definitely not because of Hathaway.

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College. A time when bodies are tight, morals are loose, and a girl's best friend is her camera phone and a bathroom mirror.

1. God Bless America

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I guess this is what they mean when they say foreplay starts on the dance floor

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